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Keeping goats

Not only are they associated with devil worship, but the males smell and the milk is said to be tainted.

They are also reputed to attack every time you turn your back.

They are charming animals full of character. The females don't smell if looked after properly and the milk tastes just fine.

They become fond of their keepers, and the keepers of them.

In many ways they are the ideal animal for a smallholder.

However, there are more myths about goats than any other livestock animal and some of these do have a foundation in reality.

 Now, if you want an animal that smells....

Have you heard the one about Billy?

Goats have completely different habits, diets and social structures than sheep.

They are very sociable, with complex relationships with others in their herd. One would be very lonely and unhappy on their own.

Goats are escapologists. They are never happier when venturing onto the chicken hut roof, indeed any roof.

Fences are for bouncing on. Goats regard it as their bounden duty to do their best to destroy any fence.

 Willow is always very popular.

Goats crave variety. They do not eat everything and certainly not too much of anything. Left to their own devices, they wander about taking a little of this and something of that.

They find hedgerows especially attractive.

From deserts to mountains, from bone dry to soaking wet, from extreme heat to extreme cold and from mountains to plains - there are always goats, often wild goats.

It is tempting to assume that they are tough enough for any landscape.

Forget it. Goats are specialists developed for their particular landscape and climate.

The average English domesticated goat spends more time complaining about the weather than their owner.

The merest sprinkling of a kindly summer shower will set off a storm of bleating and crying, that suggests murder and mayhem in the paddock.

I'm your cold weather model!

So, unless you wish to spend all day chasing in and out, letting the goats in and out, the goat paddock must have some shelter.

Goats don't mix with hay nets too well either. You need a hay rack firmly fixed to the wall.

Milking goats will need some commercial food, in fact all goats will need some especially during periods of bad weather when they won't be foraging outside.

Some commercial feed.

The classic pose of the goat bucket.

They can and do butt, but always in play. The family dog is frequently delighted to be the butt, literally, of the fun. Most goats will play for hours with the dog.

It is their very liveliness that makes milking them a haphazard affair. More milk buckets get knocked over in goat milking than ever happens with cows.

However, it is perfectly possible to allow older children to milk unattended, although not unchecked, before school, something that would be too dangerous with a cow.

Your first goat should be a goatling - that is a female between one and two years that has not yet had any kids.

It could well be wise to buy one in kid. The kid or kids will be adequate company for the mother.

Every breed has its specialist breeders.

Mother is usually entirely happy for you to handle them.

Whatever the sex, mother will take care of all matters for the time being.

This little chap is a billy.

You will need a good goat book.

Goats are one of those rare animals that sometimes produce milk without being pregnant. These are known as maiden milkers.

Otherwise, the nettle or rather the teats, will have to be grasped, and the milk shared with the kids, not yours -hers.

We will draw a veil over the undignified proceedings.

Suffice to say, unless you are an experienced milker, you will need help from someone who is, a good goat book, strong nerves and staying power.

The goat needs to be higher, hence the table. They soon get used to the idea and given a food supply, will happily jump up and down.

A long low, but strong, coffee table may well be adequate.

A couple of females and good organisation will insure that you always have milk.

You can if you wish keep the odd one for breeding purposes, but even doing that, you will still have a surplus.

The answer is simple, just like lambs, they are fattened and go for meat.

"I know what I have in mind!"

Fortunately most people of Mediterranean, Asian and African backgrounds have no such inhibitions and everywhere today there are ethical outlets for kids and fattened goats.

If you won't eat goat, plenty of your fellow countrymen and women will enjoy well reared and well produced goat meat.

Keeping goats can be a rewarding and fascinating experience. It is a very good first step to animal husbandry.

You can return to Animal Farm or Minimal System for articles that explain how this all fits into a total husbandry system, and eventually other food producing livestock.

...playing the goat

- at Hangman's Cottage, just to the south of Misery Corner.

January, 2007