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Self-Sufficiency in Style 

 transport matters

Transport matters on the farm and on the road.

As this site is read as much in the US as it is in England, the writer faces an immediate problem.

For some bizarre reason all transport related equipment is given different names in different English speaking countries.

Actually usually "was" is more appropriate. The Asians have been imposing a much needed vocabulary discipline on the rest of us, ever since their first car factory.

So whilst we are stuck with "Boot" and Bonnet" versus "Hood" and "Trunk," we will, as always, manage.

Transport conditions and the demands on vehicles are completely different between say Texas and Norfolk (UK) or between Wales and Australia.

Snobbery comes into it too.

Oh, yes it does!  Nothing enthuses the male of the species as his personal vehicle, as much in El Dorado, Texas as Essex, England.

So vehicles for the self-sufficient will be a mixture of enthusiasm, image and practicality.

 One can get a bit excited about your personal wheels.

 The only uniform you will need will be overalls.

Have you ever stood outside a rural parking lot in New Mexico? Rows of absolutely immaculate huge twin cab pick-up trucks: sparkling despite dirt track roads.

Anywhere in rural Britain, even where the roads are pristine clean, the self-sufficiency vehicle will naturally be completely filthy, straw in the passenger compartment and caked-on mud everywhere.

All a question of image.

  American readers won't know what a "Chelsea tractor" is, or that it is a bone of contention with everyone in Britain, except presumably the owners.

 Large 4WD vehicles - often Landrovers or Jeeps,  complete with bull bar, have become a menace in the cities. Designed for rough rural needs, they became a trophy car for the jet set in London, ultimately being bought by suburban dwellers to take the children to school.

Mostly bought by men for their wives, presumably on the basis that the occupants will be safer from the appalling driving outside the schools, they have become both a menace and a laughing stock.

Rural America needs large vehicles with high clearance. The drainage systems both in the country areas and even in town are completely different from those in the UK or Ireland.

Floods in America are sudden, difficult to handle and the need for big vehicles very real.

Most self-sufficiency buffs in the UK, simply do not need "off-road" transport. It is actually a big plus: they can afford to economise.

Mind you nothing completely explains rows of sparkling pick-ups in the US backwoods, and filthy vehicles trundling through market towns in Britain..

Anyway, vive le difference!

 Big big wheels for flash floods.

...and this only has four wheels!

The self-sufficient in lowland England could manage with a second-hand family car, at home with drizzle, providing at least one window that will open to expel the smell of wet dog.

 So your vehicle is very much a matter of horses for courses.

But, naturally since human beings are involved, it is not quite that simple.

That is the politest rendering possible of the collective opinion of your neighbours.

They will very naturally, and occasionally correctly, label you as "stark raving mad."

That will not stop them admiring your efforts - secretly.

So there is no harm whatsoever in kicking over the traces, providing your comfort and safety is assured.

If you are in the US, I suggest the filthiest pick-up in the county.

In the UK, clearly no 4WDs and you should occasionally throw out surplus straw, hurl a bucket of water over the vehicle and evict the dog.

You could even go so far as to clean it.

 The pick-up has many uses.

Since you hardly ever have time to go out, and usually no further than the nearest hardware store, it follows that fuel economy is just not that important.

So you can, if you wish, still feel virtuous in a stretch limo.

However hay transporting from the meadow might be a problem.

Carrying building materials, dog or livestock, carting logs or compost, going shopping or catering for a weekend away: the pick-up is a winner.

One with a detachable covered back - a "lid" and a tow bar offers much. You may be able to use the back for transporting animals other than the dog, but a livestock trailer can be towed.

And with a two seat European model, there is no space for the mother-in-law.

 Back-off.

Back-on.

Lorry drivers are polite to you. That is possibly sympathy.

Nobody expects you to drive fast.

Car park scratches merely add character.

You can relax with a pick-up and make friends. Everyone wants to know someone with a pick-up. There is always a job.

There is a lot to choosing your vehicle.

...transports of delight

- from Hangman's Cottage, just to the south of Misery Corner.

July, 2006