Self-Sufficiency in Style
Christmas spirit
A memoir of
Christmas's long ago
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Self-Sufficiency in Style Christmas spirit A memoir of Christmas's long ago
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Christmas spirit is an important ingredient in any shipping office. More than 10 years ago, in those halcyon days before all hell broke out in the Balkans, a Felixstowe company represented a Yugoslav ship owner called Losinjska Plovidba. Losinjska operated a liner service from the North Sea to the Eastern Mediterranean. Apart from a seemingly irresistible urge to send their ships into every civil war in the area, the operation was a great success. Their hospitality and generosity were legendary. They were popular. |
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wines and spirits would arrive by Losinjska vessel, duty duly paid and piled in the
corner of the English office ready for distribution on Christmas Eve.
There were two cases of the very best Croatian Red wine, two of the equivalent White, two of Cherry Liquor and two of Pear. The final two cases were of a mysterious nature: "Pelinkovac Gorki Liker." It was the custom in this office that the most junior member should have first choice of the bottles, working their way slowly up the ranks until finally, the boss took what remained. The first year the system worked well and the boss, being the last in line, arrived home with a mixed case of half a dozen bottles. |
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In January, the deliberations
began. The wines were thoroughly appreciated. The Cherry Liquor was
considered a winner. The Pear was considered just a little strong for
palates accustomed to English Ale.
The Gorki Liker was universally disliked. It was made from figs. Syrup of Figs together with Caster Oil and Liquid Paraffin were until very recently the universal medicines force fed to English children. Syrup of Figs was a deadly and effective laxative. Childhood memories linger. The staff did not like Gorki Liker. |
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The following year, the ten cases arrived as usual and the traditional
distribution followed on Christmas Eve. The first chose last and the last
first.
The boss went home with half a dozen bottles of the Gorki Liker. His wife was scornful. "Why can’t you bring home some of the decent stuff? I really enjoyed the wine." |
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In January the office
discussions began.
"How did you get on with the Gorki Liquor?" they asked with a grin. "Well you have to be careful with it," the boss answered. "As you know it has the reputation of being a powerful aphrodisiac." "Has it?" the office replied with thoughtful looks. "You are kidding?" "I shouldn’t think it’s true," the boss said retreating to his office. |
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The following Christmas, the office must have suddenly discovered a taste
for "Gorki Liquor." There was none left for the boss.
Today the boss, long retired, is on his last bottle. Just in case rumours start – well we all know how shipping is! He says that he finds it makes an excellent dessert accompanied by over-ripe bananas. Well, that’s his story anyway. |
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Could one of my readers just mention to Losinjska that the last bottle is nearly empty? And it is Christmas, after all. |
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Happy Christmas - from Hangman's Cottage, just to the south of Misery Corner. |
HOME PAGE or another Christmas Story from other years - Christmas Carol or The Man who saved Christmas or Christmas Poultry
